Hardcore Pepperocini

Wednesday, March 30, 2005

"...Somewhere back there in the dust, that same small town in each of us..."

-Don Henly, End of the Innocence

I am SO glad that Jessica and Amber came up this weekend. We had so much fun that it almost seems like it didn't even happen. I have the best friends in the whole world.

Yesterday was a day off for me, and there was a short but impressive hailstorm in the early afternoon that rocked my world, and it reminded me of a day that happened sometime last year. I had arrived at the music building a little before 9 AM and when I got there I realized that the power was out. The hall was full of students, most of whom were there for Peggy's 9 AM Music History class, and they were overcome with excitement that their class had been cancelled. It seemed that every student present only wanted to know one thing: "Can I go home?" But leave it to the piano students to stand out in a crowd. Gina, Vernon, Karen, Ginger and I had all showed up to practice, and we were simply not ready to let a little power outage ruin our plans. I snagged the classroom with the big window that allowed enough light for me to see my music. Karen, Gina, Vernon and Ginger somehow found candles, and lit them in the practice rooms so they could practice by candlelight. I just remember loving that morning, loving the fact that I had friends like me who instead of going home to get another hour of sleep, chose to light candles so they could play piano.

Speaking of piano, I just got an e-mail from a student at UW that I contacted awhile ago, and he informed me of a studio class that will be in a couple of weeks. Yay! I hope I'm not working... I wonder if I want to play something... My plan for today is to get through my ENTIRE Mozart concerto! It is really fun. My Chopin Etude is hard, but it is coming along slowly.

My next plan of action is to find a teacher...

Fly yourself to the moon, put the world on a string and feel welcome to the party. You need to treat yourself instead of waiting for someone else to come through. Celebrate your own accomplishments.

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

"And just like that, life comes in, and things begin to change."

Carrie,Sex in the City

I have felt so great these last couple of days. I don't want to go into "why" in my blog, because it falls under the category of stuff that I don't blog about. But let's just say that I finally shed a big weight that I've been dragging around for a long time. And now its like I have this part of my brain back, all of the energy that was focused on this one issue, and I didn't even realize how much energy that was until I got it back... its a relief to feel like ME again.

Today is my day off. I was going to go to a nearby park that I have yet to see and finish the last 60 pages of my book, and I still might, but I think I might just go home and practice all day. Plus, I have alot of laundry to do, even though I already did two loads this morning. Speaking of which, when I was opening the door of my apartment to go get my clothes, there was a rolled up piece of paper outside my door. I unrolled it to discover that it was from a local church, and I couldn't help but laugh when I read it. It was saying that the church has "Free clothes and free food for anyone who wants to be blessed!" (And yes, there was an exclamation mark, I didn't just add that myself). What made it extra funny was that it totally looked like a flier for a college party... gee whiz.

My mom sent me an e-mail that they have a new study that proves women are more complex than men... duh! Hey mom, if you still have the link, could you post it in my "comments" section?

Jessica and Amber are coming this weekend! I'm soooooo excited! The three of us haven't been together since my birthday! I really like having people visit me, not just because it entertains me, but because it forces me to clean my apartment. Although in comparisn to my last apartment, the mess in my current place bares no comparison. Thank goodness!

Oh my gosh, my horoscope is a little too perfect... I wonder if the astrologer people are spying on me:

You've got superhuman powers of forgiveness all of the sudden. That big romantic wrong done to you? You're over it. And the best forgiveness of all? Forgiving yourself.

Wednesday, March 16, 2005

"Life is full of small comings and goings, and for everything we take with us, we leave something behind."

-Summer of '42

Okay, so I thought that I posted on Wednesday but I guess I didn't, so I'll just attach that entry to this one. Not alot has been going on. One of my co-employees threw his back out which meant I worked more than expected this weekend, but I totally need the money, so I'm not complaining. Today I have the day off and I am totally psyched to practice all day and start my Chopin Etude. I had a dream last night that Ginger and I lived in a trailer park, and the music building was across the street, and some guy was playing the 1st Chopin Etude over and over. It was technically okay, but his phrasing was awful, and Ginger and I were yelling at him and he wouldn't stop playing. Grrr.

Okay, here is my entry from Wednesday:

My mommy-face was here for about 24 hours, (Monday afternoon until Tuesday morning), and it was really fun. On Monday we walked (and walked and walked) downtown and had REALLY good seafood, and I showed her where I work, and it was muy fun-o. Then we went to the store and got junk food, then went to my place and watched an episode of Felicity, a movie that my mom brought with her, and Super Nanny. The next morning we went to Denny's for breakfast, then to the store, then we went to my place and mommy gave me a cooking lesson. Then we were laying around and watching TV when my boss called asking me to come into work, which I was glad to do because I need the hours. So that is when mommy went home. Oh, and she brought the rest of my stuff so now I have all of my clothes! That is very exciting.

I woke up this morning feeling very tired and kinda run-down, and I REALLY hope I'm not getting sick. I have today off and am going to rest, rest, rest, drink water, and rest. And practice piano in between resting.

I stole this from
my sister's blog:

1. Song that sounds like happy feels: "Float On" by Modest Mouse

2. Earliest (music) memory: Um... Probably listening to the old Muppet records that we used to have.

3. Last CD you bought: I can't believe I'm about to admit this... FINE, I bought the Ashlee Simpson CD for $6.00. And I like it. Its fun, and it doesn't make me moody or introspective, its just fun music to listen to in the morning. Sue me.

4. Reminds you of school:
Elementary School: Any typical 80s music, (Michael Jackson, Madonna, Cyndi Lauper).
High School: Boyz II Men, Tupac, GooGoo Dolls, Joni Mitchell, Springsteen, James Taylor, Elton John, Billy Joel, Mary Beth Maziarz, and just about every artist who had a song on Dawson's Creek.
College: Oh man... Tori Amos, Dave Matthews, Counting Crows, Eminem, Tom Petty, Modest Mouse, and about a million others.

5. Total Music Files on your PC: I've never used a computer to download music. The closest I have come is when I burned some songs that my brother had downloaded on his computer onto a CD.

6. Song for listening to repeatedly when depressed: "The Scientist" by Coldplay, "Toast" by Tori Amos, "Every now and then" by Garth Brooks, "The Best Deceptions" by Dashboard Confessional", "Mother" by Pink Floyd, ... I could go on about this one for awhile, but I'll just stop now.

7. Sounds British, but isn't: I don't know, this is kind of a weird question.

8. Song you love, band you hate: Song I love: "Sweet Baby James" by James Taylor.

9. A favorite song from the past that took ages to track down: In general, if I want to find a song, I can't rest until I do, so I don't usually give it a chance to take "ages". But it took me awhile to find "Both Hands" by Ani Difranco. I heard it this summer and had to have it, but I heard it being sung at a campfire and wasn't even positive who sang it. Luckily I remembered a line that the wonders of the internet used to find the song. ("I'm recording our history now on the bedroom wall and eventually the landlord will come and paint over it all.")

10. Bought the album for one good song: I bought a Duran Duran CD for "Hungry like the Wolf"

11. Worst song to get stuck in your head: I know this might not count, but after spending 10 years of my life in choirs, its TORTURE. Not just to get choir songs in your head, but to have only the alto part which isn't even the melody!

12. Best song to dump a beer on someone's head to, then storm out of the bar? Duh! "Friends in Low Places" by Garth Brooks! Right as he says "I toasted you said 'honey we may be through, but you'll never hear me complain"... oh man, that would be FUN!

13. Who should do this next? Whoever wants to!

Saturday, March 12, 2005

A random thought for the day that might make some of you smile:

Does anyone but me find it funny that every time my stomach growls, I check my cell phone because I always have it on vibrate and now it is a reflex? Like maybe my cell phone is in my stomach...

Tuesday, March 08, 2005

"When you are old and thinking back on things, I hope that you'll remember me just a little."

-Snow Falling on Cedars

I've been working like crazy these past few days. My coworkers are really cool though, so that at least helps the 8 and a half hour shifts go by a little faster. Yesterday I had the day off but I was downtown for a large part of the day, getting a new ID and returning some clothes that I have been meaning to return for about a month.

Then I went to Barnes and Noble and finished my book, which was really good. I was actually planning on renting the movie tonight. I saw it when it was in the theatres, and I actually remember not liking it that much, but now that I've read the book I want to watch it again. I was planning on going to Blockbuster right after I finished up here, but then the mail came, and I had a package! I opened it up, and it was a present from my mommy! So now I think I'm going to hold off on the movie and spend the rest of the day practicing and watching Felicity.

I can play my new Ravel piece, and I just started a Debussy Suite yesterday, and I need to pick a Chopin Etude to learn out of the five that I have narrowed down. Stefanie and Vernon had their senior recitals last weekend and Stefanie said they both did really well. I'm sad that I missed them, but I'm going to get them to send me the CDs.

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

"It had become a habit with him to lose himself."

-Willa Cather

Yesterday I had an audition at a bar on the East side. It was for a singer/piano player, one night a week, four hours a night. When I responded to the ad I thought they only needed a piano player. Then the owner called me on Sunday night and told me they were looking for a singer too, and asked if I could audition on Tuesday. I said yes, because really, what in the world did I have to lose? I don't consider myself a singer, but I CAN sing. So I showed up yesterday with several songs ready, but they only wanted to hear two. I did "Thanks that was fun" by the Barenaked Ladies, because I know it really well, and "Tiny Dancer". They liked me. They told me to come and see the life there this weekend and to let them know if its something that I want to do. In a nutshell, they pretty much offered me the job.

But, I have decided not to take it. I actually made that decision the minute I realized it was actually an option. Getting 4 hours of music ready every week, its just too much. If it was just piano and no singing, I could do that in a heartbeat. But I'm not a pro at singing and I just don't have the time to make myself into one. I still want to go to grad school, I still fantasize about being like Olga, and I'm never going to get that way if I take that job. I need to stay focused, which is hard with no teacher, no piano friends in Seattle, and feeling lost in general.

Even though I realized this isn't the job for me, it was really fun trying for it. The piano was AMAZING, and it was fun to pull some Elton John out of my hat, and it made me remember how much I need to perform. So now I'm totally reinspired to get music back into my life in a consistent way. To top it off, when I set out to go to the audition yesterday, I opened my door and there was a package. Do you know what it was? My audition music that I ordered for grad school. Hmmm...

Oh, and to the audition I had to go to the metro tunnel to catch my bus. The metro tunnel is cool. It made me feel like I was in an old movie or something.

When I got home last night I called Stefanie, who had actually e-mailed me the day before and I didn't even know! It was cosmic. Anyways, we talked for two hours about nothing but piano, and it was really nice. Today I have the day off of work, so I made it my personal mission to find a piano where I could play as loud and long as I wanted. There is a church pretty near by and I called and the guy was super cool about letting me come practice on their great piano, and I spent the morning/afternoon playing Czerny, Haydn, Bach, Brahms, and Chopin as loud as I wanted. And it felt great. I can't even explain what goes on in my brain when I play piano. Its like when I'm not playing I have all of this stuff swimming around in my head and I think about so many things all at once. When I play, that is all still there, but it becomes so comprehensible, and while I'm playing it is like everything fits together and makes total sense. Its great.